Positively negative

Little bear has learned to say 'no'.

He is managing some other words now. He does a very good 'juice', and 'blue' and 'yellow' are more or less recognisable. I am deliberately not understanding as much, and trying to encourage him to tell me what he wants/needs.

He still will not convey any information about the state of his nappy. However, that was when we first saw 'no' in action. 'How is your nappy?' I asked. Little bear looked furtive, in the sort of 'a big boy who I didn't know did it and ran away' sort of furtive. He shook his head, 'no'. The unease he showed as he said that led straight to the changing mat - the nappy was not suitable for description. 'No' is the standard response to any question about his nappy, and the amount of furtive guilt is directly proportional to the speed which I drag him to the changing mat.

Then we are getting the random 'no' which I believe all toddlers indulge in. 'Would you like an apple or a pear?' 'no'.

There is also the 'no' that translates into, 'are you mad, woman?' 'How about a nap?' comes under that, or 'would you like some more apple/pear/banana?' when he is more interested in his cars. The blank disbelief little bear can convey by that is amazing.

The absolute cutest is the printouts. Little bear is still extremely fond of Numberjacks, so I had the screen on Cbeebies Home page to print some out to colour. 'Should I print out Number One?' Little bear gives me a gorgeous smile and shakes his head. 'No'. 'How about Number Two?' 'No', again with a cute grin. And so on, all the way through the screen and all the other printouts on the page. And the smiles got more and more playful, he was teasing his mum (in the nicest way possible).

I find one thing very interesting. I am not as direct as my late mother who was happy pouring jugs of cold water over toddlers having tantrums. I don't think I could be so ruthless, though I would never condemn a mother at the end of her tether being pushed by a little one. However neither myself nor dear heart would tolerate much in the way of defiance. I always thought that the toddler spell of 'no' which all toddlers go through, would be a nightmare clash of wills. However little bear, operator that he is, has worked out that outright defiance gets him nowhere. Asking nicely or being calm gets him a lot more. If little bear threw a tantrum at being taken to the changing mat he would get very little sympathy from me. As it is, a furtive 'no' gets a lot more tolerance and cuddles and the usual games.

And it amazing the amount of 'stuff' he has obtained by 'asking' nicely.

I would also add that he is a Mr Mischief. While we visited darling uncle, little bear indicated that he wanted some banana. Now, he had been stuffing himself non stop for the previous two hours and I was sure it was greed and not hunger, so I told him no. After a minor grump, little bear put the banana back in the box. Then picked up a parsnip and took a swift bite out of it! The comedy timing was immaculate - and saved him from more than a token telling off as no-one could keep a straight face.

I don't stand a chance.