Plague again

Darling father yesterday fell back and banged his head. Today he is achy, also he has a bad cold. He had rum tonight instead of whiskey.

He has been off form all day, though patience itself with little bear, and I am now fussing. He couldn't even stay awake for the football.

I have a cold. Dear heart has a cold and upset stomach. Little bear has a very green nose, an allergy to naps, no matter how much they are needed and showing the signs of about to come down with something dreadful.

And I am still happy, because it is Christmas.

Three and one day

Little bear is passing on a rather sticky hug to all those who wished him happy birthday.

Today he was, well, still tired. He woke up a little earlier than otherwise, I think, because he was muttering 'hand hurt, hand hurt' before counting and reciting the alphabet to himself in a quiet, contented sort of way.

He 'helped' me put away all the groceries from the delivery - it did take a while but I didn't cry and I didn't swear so I have given myself lots of points for that.

He played with Grandad without mercy. He chased evil cat. He played with the noisy alphabet his Godfather so kindly bought for him for a birthday present (for Christmas it was a noisy globe - and he dratted remembered the dratted batteries for both).

He insisted on wearing a fleece jacket over a fleece sweater, even though it was inside and didn't collapse from heat stroke.

He gave me some gorgeous cuddles.

He repeatedly touched the new television and ended up on the naughty step.

And then he went to sleep like a lamb, after lots of kisses.

Also he is still wearing the orange pumpkin bucket on his head.

HOW much?!! (Again)

Darling father reads the Daily Mail and kindly passed me a supplement.

One of the fashion pages had an outfit that cost £8,550. Or a brand new car, from a small car range. It would pay for a sizeable chunk of a Chelsea Tractor.

Somehow I could cope with this. These were not clothes I aspired to (I thought the model looked gothically ridiculous) and if you have the money, well I suppose you can look like you were looking for an eighties video to appear in if you wanted.

What really upset me were the tights featured. They had boots for nearly £1300, £1200 for a dress - I could understand that. But at the bottom of the list of items were tights - £39. Who the hell buys tights for £39? Seriously? I mean, surely there is always a risk of a run, ladder or snag, even if you are in a roller and not the number 39 bus? How could anyone spend what I would consider a reasonable price for a skirt or top that I expected to last on tights?

And what was worse, they were awful! Even if you had Kate Moss legs they were not flattering. Normal legs would look like they were part of the upholstery! Dots and twirls - I wouldn't give them house room if they were 99p for five, and I bet you can only wear them once!

Dearie dearie me!

Happy Birthday

Little bear is three years old today...

... and there were lots of presents! So far nothing has beaten the orange pumpkin bucket for trick or treating still being worn on the head as a helmet, but some things have come close.

He had books, which were marvellous, a phonics game which he played full volume while watching Barney (who I have come to loathe) and one of the most complicated wooden 'Build a Tractor' things that I have ever seen - described as 3+.

He hasn't had his birthday cake yet. Despite being exhausted, over excited and generally all in he refused any hint of nap this afternoon and we barely managed to get his favourite pizza down him before dragging him off to bed.

Birthday cake for breakfast?

He is growing up so fast, I can see more and more a little boy when I look at him. And he misses so little. I was singing 'ten fat sausages' and when I got to the bit where there were eight and one went pop and the other went bang, he interrupted. 'Seven.' he insisted. He is used to all the rhymes that go down by ones, and he wasn't being done out of a verse. All attempts to show him on my fingers that eight less two is six were futile.

I can just tell, he is going to be the sort that will complain about a smorgasbord because they left the tops of the sandwiches off.

Undaunted spirit

Darling father is seventy eight. His father bought one of the first editions of the Daily Mail and darling father also buys it, out of loyalty.

He cannot manage without his daily paper.

Regrettably he refused to let dear heart go and get the paper today and ventured over the re-frozen half thawed snow. Of course he fell.

And was completely undaunted! He is complaining more about a cold he is developing.

I can learn a lot from my father (he was sober when it happened).

It's the thought that counts

My sister in law visited today with presents - an extremely important point for little bear.

The biggest success - a bucket that was intended for Halloween which little bear immediately placed on his head, and has worn it ever since.

Slippery customer?

Darling father went for a walk Christmas Eve.

There is a lot of snow lying, and the paths here are quite steep, especially compared with the flat area of Cheshire where he currently lives. But he wanted to put the lottery on. I did point out that I had a lottery account (one lucky dip, every Wednesday and Saturday, it's the only way I remember to buy a ticket). I could put his tickets on online. He decided he wanted the walk.

And the company and a pint at the local pub known to everyone as the Hanover, except for darling father who calls it the Hangover.

He went out again today. He had to have a paper.

And a brief call in the Hangover. No doubt he is becoming known.

I am happy

I am happy, it is Christmas and I am happy.

Little bear has just had some child Kaolin for a dire rear. Dear heart's flu symptoms are beginning to ebb. Evil cat gave me a non destructive cuddle and didn't try and attack me when I was ironing. Darling father is being a star looking after little bear. And whisky.

Little bear's list of presents grows apace. I have already written some thank you notes. Regrettably he is now convinced a never ending stream of presents should be heading his way. I am not impressed. He is shattered, over excited and lacking quiet time and threw the most amazing tantrum in front of dear heart and darling father. The last time he threw a real tantrum was just before he went down with a vile cough, so I am fearing the worst. I think the roof will fall in if I fail to take him to nursery when due, but they forbid little ones with dire rear, and as babies are present that is understandable.

After dragging him bodily up the stairs and fighting through a screaming fit at the absence of a toy axe he then gave me the most gorgeous smile as he calmed down temporarily, but then went back to fury when he realised that I was not allowing him to sneak out from his room again.

And yet he is still having the most lovely moments, even in the midst of the temper. I am such a soft mum.

Actually, after a relatively uneventful bedtime, I feel really content.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas.

Also, little bear is finally asleep after being sick. Dear heart has the flu. I am feeling a little sniffling. Darling father is fine.

And I am really happy, because it is Christmas.

Darling father has arrived, havoc commences

A Big Day

Little bear has gone to nursery. I pick him up @ 12.30. Then I take him in to nursery again for the party @ 2pm and then dash into town.

I race through some shops then meet darling father. Then I collect little bear @ 4pm, who by this time will be hysterical and exhausted.

Then he gets to see Grandad again!!!!

Anyone like to guess what bedtime is going to be like?

Fantastic Victory!!!!

I persuaded little bear to wear a sweater.

It may not seem like much, but it is the latest result in a string of battles. This is a fleece hoodie with a tigger on.

Coming back last night over the powdery snow I could not persuade him to countenance either hat (unless a Bob the Builder plastic hat) or gloves.

I am confident that battles will continue, but it is a step in the right direction.

Cool Yule

I am a Christian, and very happy with that.

But to any Pagans - have a wonderful Yule, and I hope that the coming year brings blessings to you.

Let them eat cake

I actually did some baking yesterday.

Two loaves of coconut bread are on there way to dear heart's work place and I made some weetabix cake, which I particularly enjoy.

Regrettably the weetabix cake is undercooked. So today, let us eat cake! I can make some more tomorrow.

A Matter of Faith

Yesterday I watched parts of two documentaries, little bear permitting etc.

One programme proved conclusively that the Bible was completely unsupported by archeology and the other was completely convincing that the Bible is shown to be true (for a given value of true) by archeology.

My view? Well, as a Christian I am happy to read the Bible, and as a history fanatic I am happy to enjoy the programmes about archeology. However I believe very strongly that these programmes say more about those making them than the Bible itself.

Hot and Cold

I have had the heating on today, as little bear has had a much needed nap in his room, and he can't be trusted with a heater. I really try and keep the heating down, there is no overall thermostat and I can't seem to get the radiators to adjust properly. Sigh.

So while he napped I had some time on the computer, and was treated to the wonderful sight of all the melted snow falling from our roof. It is so frustrating. Effectively we are heating the roof. But we don't have any access to the roof space/loft to put in insulation.

Having no access is not a bad thing - at one point one of the locals who lived in this block of eight used to go up into the roof space via one attic and dip into the other houses. This was normally to avoid the police callers at the door. I do not believe anything went missing, but it is quite a dispiriting thought.

Little bear refuses to wear a sweater, and I am refusing to coddle him too much in case it tempts him to put another layer on. He is complete distraught at the suggestion of a vest as well. And hats, and gloves, even walking back from nursery in the snow.

The world is a very odd place

Browsing ebay (my friend) for consolation and ideas.

I just want to ask - who thought it was a good idea to have a wooden ashtray? I mean, really? And as I found them (yes, this particular idea seems to have had some favour) in the antiques section, I want to know how they lasted that long.

And again

Little bear had his hearing test this morning.

Two buses there including a protracted stop for a drum, he behaved impeccably in the test, even wore earphones when they thought he would be too nervous (little bear rarely is nervous - au contraire).

Now I know how unco-operative he can be, and he has an ear infection and he is short of sleep. I was so proud when he sat where he should, stayed sat where he should, smiled his gorgeous smile and generally was a darling. They hardly had to coax him and he demonstrated clear understanding of everything going on.

Two buses back including some token flakes of snow.

The verdict - his hearing is fine, but we want to see him again in three months.

So fed up.

A wonderful visit

Darling uncle and darling brother arrived today.

Little bear had the time of his life - lots of toys, lots of goodies, lots of fuss. Evil cat graced us with her presence and even cuddled darling uncle - unheard of.

And his appetite has returned. Yesterday I could not persuade him to have a milky bar. Today he has had: One left over milky bar, several glasses of milk (aka silver milkshake), three of the Sainsbury dippers which are philadelphia and breadsticks, a sizeable handful of grapes, several maltesers, a foam shrimp, half a carton of expensive M&S berries, some apple pieces, a stalk of celery and a severe suck of a tomato. That list seems incomplete, because I am confident he has not stopped eating all day, but the list seems a little sparse.

Little bear today discovered the fridge and tried to investigate the contents. Later he asked for a yoghurt. I explained that we didn't have any yoghurt. Little bear showed me what he meant - a tub of brandy butter destined for Christmas puddings. He was very upset at not having a yoghurt though he had been eating more or less continually since waking.

Little bear now has a toy Santa, which he was very pleased at, and a chicken which has a light inside that changes colours. Little bear loves this chicken, and it is in danger of being promoted to an honorary pandy.

It was really wonderful to see my family. The only time that I could have cried was when darling uncle, who has no children, asked little bear if he would like a drum. Now, you never ask a little one of around three years old if they would like something unless you are about to hand it to them. Darling uncle did not have a drum on him. And the question was just before he left. Lucky him. I was interrogated regarding the drum's whereabouts all afternoon.

Oops

Little bear was banished to his room, exhausted and in need of a nap. In a fit of absent minded madness I left the keys on the hook nearest the door.

I came downstairs, feeling like a dishrag myself, and listened to little bear grumbling. It calmed down somewhat and then I heard, thump, crash, waaaahhh.

I dashed upstairs. Little bear had stood on a (ricketty) wooden box, obtained the keys and fitted the keys into the lock (which is a right fiddle for me to manage as the keys are a bit odd). He had managed to unlock the wire and then fallen off the box. The wire is particularly tricky to get out of the lock, which may have slowed him down.

So he came downstairs for an industrial sized cuddle. I managed to persuade him to watch the Numberjacks for a change, as we can both recite Adventures in Letterland now. All went well for the first ten minutes and then the Problem Blob appeared. Little bear was absolutely distraught, and a further industrial sized cuddle was required, but I coaxed him to watch to the end. I wanted him to see that the Problem Blob was chased away.

I am a bit tired.

Alternate versions

Little bear solemnly told me, 'hickory dickory dock, the mouse ran up the giraffe.'

I just thought I would share

Keeping up appearances

Little bear loves his nursery. He complains when he doesn't go and sometimes has to be dragged out of there. No, I am not exaggerating and it is quite literal. They have lots of exciting toys. Sometimes if I pick him up a little later then all the little ones are in one room, often one with different toys that little bear hasn't explored and he deeply and bitterly resents any attempt to prevent him from playing.

I thought it would be appropriate to buy a smallish box of Roses or a large quantity of something like grapes for the workers. However under the tree the parents have already started depositing large tins of chocs for the staff.

I need to keep up with the other parents for little bear's sake, I suppose, but I had hoped that this sort of competition and standards would hold off for a little longer.

Edited to add - I think I will not go down the silly large box of chocs, they must have enough to open a shop at the end of it. I think I shall take in some fruit for them, I am sure I can find a suitable basket/bowl. Deary me

Has anyone seen my sanity?

Last night I had a dream that after an emergency meeting of a knitting club (I don't belong to a knitting club) it was decided to bury the club records in Hardup Hester's garden. I have absolutely no idea where that lot came from, or why knitting club records would be such a state secret.

I am not sure if my oddest dream was when I dreamt of three headless bishops knocking on the door to come and exorcise John Barrowman or the shark infested sweetcorn, but while I do know that my dreams, however odd to me, are not that unusual.

Besides, the world is far odder. Last night I was watching a documentary and the scientist told the camera in a very matter of fact way that he had been studying the feather development in some mutant chickens and had noticed something odd. No, really! Mutant chickens? something odd? Well, I would never expect to hear those two phrases in the same sentence - what?!

The world is a very odd place.

Tiptoe tiptoe

Little bear seemed happily engrossed in his drawing, so I dashed upstairs to the loo, for a much needed visit.

I would never have realised that he had opened the bottom door and crept upstairs if I hadn't heard him whispering, 'tiptoe, tiptoe, tiptoe' as he came upstairs.

Guessing the date

Darling father was originally not coming here for Christmas - he was going away. Then he decided to come here for Christmas, but go home for New Year. Now he was coming here for Christmas and New Year and coming up a few weeks before hand. Now he is coming up probably sometime at the end of next week or the week after.

My guess is that he will arrive on the 23rd.

I am off to revise my shopping list again.

Little bear has a nap

Little bear is getting a lot better, and I hope to be able to take him to nursery tomorrow. If I don't, regardless of his state of health, little bear will declare war. I don't think it fair to ask the nursery to look after a really poorly child. I will weigh up the situation as it happens.

Well he was doing really well this morning, went upstairs for a play and a nap, and I found him, courting a relapse.

He was asleep but stirring. He was positioned head down, nappy up on a small square of flowered wallpaper that had been lining one of his drawers, on the floor. He was also chilled to the bone, which was unsurprising, as at my guess he had been there for two hours. He was also less than six inches away from a nice comfy bed with a duvet, which is his normal nap station. Absolutely no idea.

Patience running out

Just before little bear was born I obtained a new mobile phone, a motorola something. Now I am a very fidgetty person, and I quickly found that playing patience on this phone was a great thing to do with my hands. Then I found that keeping it on airplane mode meant that I could keep playing patience while I was in hospital when I was having little bear. Then I found that keeping it on silent mode meant I could play patience to keep myself awake while giving little bear a night feed. Now I find it a great thing to keep my hands occupied.

But now, after over three years and having patience played continually and having been happened to by little bear the poor old thing is getting a little frail. Today it needed all my coaxing to charge. I am going to be devastated when it finally goes.

Interruptions possible.

Little bear has a minor viral bug, with earache. Postings may be sketchy.

He was doing a very good impression of Victorian fever victim this morning (and I cuddled him for ages) but now is merely being off colour and fed up.

I hate not being able to make it all well straight away.

Poor little bear

Yesterday little bear had a lot of time on the naughty step at nursery and was a real terror to put to bed.

Today I find out why - flushed cheeks, warm to the touch, lying on the sofa watching Adventures in Letterland again!

All plans for today put on hold, and I don't care.

Quicker than I thought

I have been putting off making up the home made flavoured vodka for lovely next door for a week. Today, I just dived in, and including an extremely thorough clean it took around 15 minutes for a medium chilli vodka and a medium toffee vodka to be prepared. I thought it would take forever.

Note to self - when buying fancy bottles, ensure the mouth of the bottle big enough to take slices of chill and/or broken bits of toffee.

Another hurdle gone!

I have managed to work out how to add a picture to the side of my blog. So now you have seen little bear, his pandy, and some old man in a red suit...

All I need to do is work out how to put it into the body of text.

Dreading the nappy

Today little bear, after several days of being off his food, has eaten three bars of flapjacks illicitly obtained, sucked seriously at a pizza, eaten the centre of a small egg custard, eaten the cream and jam from a slice of cake, eaten at least a quarter of a snowman biscuit, two oranges and when he asked for a pear I found that he had necked a quarter of a bottle of ketchup as well. Oh, and one small foam shrimp.

He was supposed to be having fish and chips tonight, but I am now wracking my brains for something a little less fat laden.

I think he may have tummy ache tonight.

Little bear is curious

Little bear and I went into town. We called into the market. We called into the museum. We walked through the German Market (how much!?) Little bear was very well behaved while we were out, though I would rather gloss over some of his behaviour before and after the visit.

But every time we passed a litter bin little bear insisted on standing on tiptoes and peering in. I have no idea what he expected to find, and as the litter bins are generously distributed I was hauling him away every few yards.

Next time I may take some rubbish out so he can put an item in each one.

Spent

Found the ear protectors. Ebay is my friend...

Except the only ones I could find were in a set, which I am confident little bear will love, but it was a bit more than I wanted to spend. It was still less money than I would have spent at Makro and I sincerely hope there are here soon. I don't have much sanity and I like to try and cherish the little I have left.

And after waking at 6am, demanding dressed, wanting to go to town on the bussssss and creating holy havoc because we had to wait in for a delivery from Mr S, he is now playing lovely and quietly after the delivery.

Oh well, off to the hurricane again.

Have to spend

Some time ago little bear broke one of his favourite toys, a toy 'Bob the Builder' scrambler that had kindly been passed on from a friend. He was somewhat upset, so I purchased another, new to him from my friend ebay. With it came some toy goggles and toy ear protectors. Little bear is now far more attached to the goggles and ear protectors than the toy Scramber, and insists on wearing the ear protectors every time I blow bubbles for him (absolutely no idea).

And tonight the ear protectors got broken. Even dear heart can't mend them.

Little bear has a tenacious memory for his toys, he can remember them, ask for them even when they are hidden and will not be distracted. He doesn't usually throw a tantrum, but he enquires after a toy. Sometimes very persistently.

As an aside, last night his toy rat, Ratatouille, NEEDED a wash. I persuaded little bear to part with it for long enough to get it washed and he did not have it for bedtime. A little later we heard little bear over the monitor, apparently explaining to a pandy - 'Ratatouille, washing machine'. He missed his large rat.

So, we have a broken, temporarily more or less holding together set of Bob the Builder ear protectors and a distraught little bear. I remember seeing some in Makro, included in a lot of other toys in a set. I don't care about the other toys, just as long as I find those dratted protectors.

Antidote to spending

Another knitting magazine but I was really enjoying reading it, fascinated by a very nice, wearable man's sweater that didn't need to have stitches picked up for a collar, and in an easy rib, and chunky - I can feel next year's Christmas presents coming on...

Then I saw it. A card of quite nice buttons - £32 for nine, it was a good thing that I was sitting down.

Actually this was Simply Knitting and most of the things in there are closer to what I would consider reality. These buttons looked absolutely gorgeous and ones you would treat yourself with them for a special item and they would be worth reusing... But I am not tempted. Buttons do nothing for me. Thank goodness!

Didn't spend!

I considered getting another order from Approved Food. I thought it might be nice to get some goodies in and they still have the mini packs of apricots that little bear likes.

So trundled around the site, thinking that this looked like a good deal and that looked like a good idea. Then reviewed my basket...

... and decided we didn't need to get any of it. We have stuff in, we are within walking distance of Makro, we are within staggering distance of a chemist, two small shops selling food in reasonable condition at reasonable prices and a plethora of takeaways, we are fifteen minutes drive from either a huge Asda or a huge Sainsbury. Also I am trying to get little bear out more, so a hit and run visit to the market in town on the bus is very possible. I do not need to get anything!

I feel all liberated.

Cough cough

Little bear has another cough. And a cold. And his tummy hurts when he coughs. And his throat gets dry when he sleeps...

The night before last I managed three hours sleep and was up at 4.30 am. Last night was a little better but still broken. I am shattered. I should have napped this morning, but I just can't seem to sleep during the day.

I shouldn't really complain as little bear hardly ever gets me up at night, he is usually so good, but even if he just surfaces for a cough and then sleeps again, I am awake. Poor little mite is tired as well though.

It is such a minor cold, he is just suffering with it, poor lamb.

Little bear said 'esss'

We did some shopping today, with little bear. The first stop was Makro, where we purchased remarkably little. I looked at the toys and it was forcibly brought home - little bear did not need anything. Father Christmas will be delivering with a skip load. To add to several skiploads already here. Plus all the other bits and bobs likely to be given by the very generous people we know.

Then we went to a place called Tong Garden Centre. It is a lovely place. I can only get there if dear heart takes me, otherwise I think I would pop in more often. Obviously it is not full of plants at the moment. Instead it is full of Christmas decorations!

Little bear was wonderstruck as we trundled the trolley through the darkened room full of fibre optic trees. We looked at the pets - who always look adorable (and clean and healthy!). Little bear was horrified that the 'messy' parrot dropped a piece of banana on the floor. We all chose a Christmas decoration for this year - little bear chose red tinsel. Then the great highlight - little bear went to see Santa Claus.

It was a long wait, but little bear was very good. He went in to see Santa. Santa asked him lots of questions, like has he been good and what was the name of pandy? Then, after a lovely long fuss, he asked little bear to chose a present and little bear chose a cement mixer. Santa asked if that was what he wanted, and little bear spoke for the only time. He said, 'essss'.

Of course, he chattered freely when we got home. Mainly about the wonderful cement mixer.

Telling stories

7958 words so far, but I am concerned I am putting too much description in. I don't want it to start too slow.

But you have to introduce characters and non standard modern day settings.

The writing is making me feel so much better. Even with little bear being very. Just very. Even if the story doesn't get off to a storming start, the therapy it is giving me is excellent.

(Also, not doom, gloom angst and introspection. More looking towards mystery and action. And possibly knitting).

Average length of a modern novel is around 100,000 words, so I am not a tenth in and I have had two deaths so far, and a love interest, so I suppose it could be worse.

Ebay is my Friend

Today little bear discovered the gas cooker. He has been past it a few times and correctly identified it as 'hot' but today he discovered BUTTONS! Little bear likes pressing the buttons on crossings and lifts. And in the house there is something that has buttons as well.

So I have just ordered a set of covers for the oven knobs, a shield for the top and an oven lock.

Also considering toilet lock, fridge lock, freezer lock and microwave lock. I cannot see the immediate need for them. I am not, however, ruling out anything because little bear is little bear.

Pardon? Also dear heart is a hero

Little bear had to go for a hearing test this morning. So it was a full on no holds barred cage fighting get dressed, force breakfast in crumb by crumb, ration toys he is taking with us, and dive out of the house.

Of course little bear is as good as gold on the bus. Of course he is as good as gold at the bus stop. Then we had to change buses (two buses to get to the clinic). I left my bag on the bus.

So little bear and I were stranded at a bus stop in the rain with no ticket and no money. We did have a bag with a panda and a frog umbrella so we were not entirely without resources and a small frog bar was available to sustain little bear. And of course we had an appointment due. Fortunately I still had my mobile in my pocket, so I cuddled little bear, who was really well behaved apart from refusing to wear gloves, and rang - the bus company who 'put out a shout', and the clinic, who are sending another appt, and dear heart, who came from an hour away and rescued us. He was completely a hero and I was desperately grateful.

And the lovely driver not only kept my bag and gave it to me when the bus next came near my house, but also refused to take any money off me for a drink. I want to say that he was, I think, Polish and absolutely wonderful. All my experiences with the Polish have been good, but he was lovely. I could have hugged him! And he was really lovely to little bear who struggled to get on the bus without relinquishing his frog umbrella.

Also dear heart's boss was so good to let dear heart come, find me, watch little bear as I got my bag and then go back to work as dear heart must have been away nearly three hours and they are extremely busy.

Little bear is little bear

Yesterday I was bamboozled into purchasing a bottle of bubble mixture for little bear.

This morning, around 7am, I was awoken by a repeated, 'bubble mixure, bubble mixure' from little bear. After a three falls, two submissions and a knockout change and dressed etc we went down stairs. Little bear grabbed the bubble stuff with joy. I popped down to the kitchen for a bottle and that is when he spilt his bubble mixture. Sigh.

It was somewhat challenging to coax him into his new shirt, convince him that he did want to take some nourishment and that yes, we would get some more bubble mixture but just not right this second and yes he could watch Adventures in Letterland again.

Also, as I was so nervous about him getting out of the bedroom he is locked in with a bicycle chain on the stair gate, which he has investigated thoroughly and observed closely. He managed to knock the keys to the chain (well, wire thingy really) onto the stairs in front of the gate but just out of reach.

Just to be clear

For lunch little bear had cheese spread on toast, the Primula sort with prawns in. I put a little dab on his finger to try as it was the first time he had had it.

Just for the record, as I explained at nursery, just because a cream comes out of a yellow tube like Metanium does not mean that little bear had nappy cream on toast for lunch. No matter what he said. It was cream cheese and prawns. And yes, he had had a lot of the cream on his fingers because he thought the taste was lovely, thank you some much mother and he would take a little more if I would be so kind.

Or as he put it. 'More finger. More finger. Please.'

Also, a little triumph. At the speech therapist they were explaining how important it was for him to use two words in conjunction. Today little bear, playing helpless, said, 'Daddy pick it up.' I'll see your two words and raise you two more!

Poor little bear and evil cat

Yesterday little bear was watching Adventures in Letterland AGAIN and I was feeling poorly in the next room, listening out for him. I could hear him being happy about something and I could hear evil cat being foul mouthed but I was confident that evil cat was downstairs in the kitchen and that there was a shut stair gate between them.

Today I have found that little bear can open that stairgate and that evil cat can also get through the bars if she is determined enough (she is only skin, bone and evil).

This explains yesterday. As I was dealing with the stomach problems I heard the 'hiss, spit, wail' of evil cat getting little bear and I rushed in.

Now, before you get too concerned, evil cat had barely broken little bear's skin. You know when you catch yourself and you just get a very tiny fleck of the top layer of skin standing up in little white tufts? That is the war wound. I can't even find it today. This did not prevent little bear putting on an Oscar winning performance.

I had a lot of mixed feelings on this. First of all, I must be a bad mother as this is the third or fourth time he has been scratched in the last two years. I ought to protect him more. Then after interrogation I found that he had been holding evil cats tail so I am definitely a bad mother for raising a child that will not be kind to animals. Thirdly, but quite strongly, I thought, 'he's been scratched before - when is he going to learn that cats hurt when cuddled?' And sneaking in behind was a certain satisfaction that evil cat had been on the receiving end for a change, after regularly dishing out discomfort to me - and a tail end of guilt for that satisfaction.

Little bear had an industrial strength cuddle and evil cat had dolphin friendly tuna. They have both forgotten it.

I love little bear

Due to major heartburn I have been unable to take antidepressants for the last few days, so I am in a bad way.

The heartburn is driving me nuts, and every time I bend over I feel sooooo sick. I think it's what is called reflux, but I think of it as a dratted nuisance. I have also had half rations of sleep last night - burning acid at the back of the throat does not aid a restful night.

And little bear has been nap proof. But bless him, I must of looked tired because he insisted that I lay down on the sofa. I felt like I had had a giant hug. And he has gone to sleep like an angel (or escaped, all bets are off!)

And every time I have tried to write I have been broken off half way through a sentence. This section isn't flowing quite as I would like. However, it is a sanity saver, not a contender for Shakespeare's crown so I am not so stressed about that.

Grumbling over, I shall see if I can finish my thousand words for today in one lump. I know I will feel so much better after that and wonder what I was complaining about. Sigh.